go shorty, ish ma burdy.. we gonna party like ish my burdy..

sana me mang surprise naman sakin. never pa kong nasurprise ever. hehe.

puede palang hindi mo makita ang sarili mo sa buhay mo sa kasalukuyan.

naku, natutukso na akong kumanta ng theme song ng mulan, pero hindi eh. hindi when will my reflection show who i am inside ang drama ng buhay ko.

para bang nawala si cathy. dati volleyball muna bago lahat. ngayon parang allergic na ako sa bola. dati kahit saan puede akong yayain. ngayon andami ko munang kailangang iconsider. (actually, isa lang. kung okay lang ba kay mahalski.)

i used to be spontaneous and fun. i used to be different. now im just boring and bland. predictable.

hindi na ata ako si cathy. nagiging mahalski na ata ako.

when you have insomnia, you are never really asleep.. and you're never really awake.

i have a bad case of insomnia. not entirely unwelcome because im gonna need to stay up late for the next two weeks for the last stretch of the sem. but damn, i slept at 5am this morning. well make that around 6 because my brain won't stop working overtime. i was in bed but there were so many thoughts swimming in my head.

hanggang sa pagtulog ko hinahabol ako ng mga kailangan kong gawin! aaargh!

we had a huge fight yesterday. i was so mad, my hands were shaking. i almost missed ate dith's dinner party because we were fighting on the fone. he came to the house. we fixed things. but there will always be that incident, and i don't know if i can get over it soon.

he just makes it hard for me to trust him. i try, but he just messes things up. and i rant all day about it but all i can really do is love him.

sabi ni levinas, sa kaiba raw, malalaman mo lang kung ano ang gusto niyang ipaalam sayo.

sabi ng philo teacher ko, hindi mo raw puedeng makilala ng buong-buo ang tao. pero puede mo siyang mahalin.

puede mo siyang mahalin, pero hindi mo puedeng diktahan.

puede ko lang siyang mahalin. hay paulo mercado.

i quit friendster over the weekend, did i tell you?

feels liberating.

it's about time. masyado nang nagulo ang buhay ko sa friendster.

huwaa! kakatapos lang ng philo orals ko. tinanong ako ni mr. cruz:

ano ang punto ng pag-aaral ng pilosopiya ng pagpapakatao?

no pressure. sabay sabing "end my day right cathy b."

ayos. gusto ko sanang sabihin, wala!

ayun. nabulol, nautal, at kumabog ng todo ang dibdib ko. buti na lang tapos na. ayoko nang isipin yan.

pagkatapos tinext ko si sir jope, "ikaw may kasalanan nito, iniwan mo kasi kami!"

sabi niya "huh?! ok, ok. my fault. hehe."

hay. jope. kailan kaya kita ulit masisilayan?

i don't like myself right now.

ever felt like that?

i wonder, am i who i am right now? or am i just not myself right now?

ang labo.

[would you want me when im not myself. wait it out while i am someone else?_johnmayer]

went to school yesterday to pass some stuff and get some stuff.

ang sarap pumunta sa school kapag walang pasok. walang tao! andaming parking space!

naka-3 ako sa orals! mwahaha. not bad. kala ko mas sabog pa yung grade ko. heheh.

kahit na naka A ako kay jope, okay na rin ang B kay Mr. Cruz. hindi naman kase same amount of effort yung binigay ko. :p

hay, second day of bakasyon. im a little bored, but thankful that i don't have to wake up early.

oh, we have a new car, did i tell you? it came last saturday. red vios. for me and bebe. ladidah.

as i was driving home from saturday's gimmick, i finally felt i was 20. felt real good.

pau and i fought throughout the weekend though.

so all in all, good stuff and bad, i give the weekend a B.

*nyeh. ang korni mo talaga cathy.*

lahat yata talaga ng bagay me kapalit.

unti-unting natutupad yung mga pangarap ko, pero unti-unti rin kaming nagkakalayo.

pagod na akong umiyak hanggang makatulog.

kunin niyo na ang kotse ko at lahat ng oportunidad na dumating. ibalik niyo lang sa akin ang kaligayahan ko.

pagod na ako.